This was one of six article I wrote for HMPPS during COVID 19 . The article was sent out across the whole estate.
How many times do you hear yourself say “Why does this always happen to me”? In truth the reason it always happens is because we make it happen.
I remember when I first heard this, I thought they were chatting rubbish.
The reason for this was that I looked out and not in. I blamed everyone else for my life. It was her fault, his fault, their fault, the systems fault. It was everybody’s fault but my own.
Blaming everyone justified my life, a life that was on a self-destruct. When I blamed everyone else it meant I only had to focus on them and not me. The real truth was this ‘I was the problem it was me, not them’. I was the one in the police cells, the court, the prison cell, taking the drugs, it was always me. There had to come a time that I started to take personal responsibility for my life and my actions.
I recently created a post on LinkedIn that looked at fate and how it impacts our lives. I used the analogy of an acorn falling from a tree. The reason for this is I have recently become aware of what it means to come from privilege.
Imagine if you was once an acorn and on the day of your birth you fell from the tree, Did you land on ground that had all the nutrients and sunlight and water for you to grow into a great oak?
Did you have both parents? Did you have an extended family? Did you have full time education? Did you go to after school clubs? Did you go on holidays? Did you have food in the cupboard? Did you go to college? Did you go to university? Did you have an allowance and on tap support from your family?
This is privilege and this gives you a head start
On the 23rd January 1985 I was sentenced to Detention Centre, this was what was known as ‘Short Sharp Shock’ and the politicians at the time believed they could scare you straight, for some it had the complete opposite effect.
Let me give you some background of my story, before this date (that is permanently imprinted within my mind) I had grown up in a family that had a historic relationship with the care system, the dysfunction that existed was there way before I was born.
I did not deal with this well and I became more reckless within my behaviour and had many brushes with the law, it was this that led to me going to Send Detention Centre 14 days after my 14th birthday, back then you had to be 14 before you could get a custodial sentence
I am writing this blog as I was fortunate to visit HMP Send that is now a woman’s Prison. The day was one of many emotions and also a process of healing, another circle completed. It was a pleasure to see that this Prison that created so much pain and trauma is now a place of healing and has amazing therapeutic programmes for those within their care.
I was in a coffee shop with a dear friend yesterday and we were discussing mind-sets. It is one of those new terms that we are hearing in business every day FIXED MIND SET Vs GROWTH MIND SET.
During the chat we discussed my own CHANGE and how I went from the person I once was to who I am now. CHANGE is an understatement of what happened to me I like to call it a complete TRANSFORMATION. I had a psychic shift that made me look at life in a completely new way.
Today I am a behaviour change specialist and have worked with individuals for over 10 years. Within my previous career I was called a substance misuse worker, a support worker, a youth worker, to name but a few. I then went into management and started to manage the services I once worked in. I started to see similarities within their roles, I started to get the workforce to see themselves as behaviour change practitioners, this opened up their “Mind-sets” and helped them see possibilities of how they could develop professionally through austerity.
Have you ever thought that you would like to change career, or be more successful within your current company? I bet you write yourself off because you think you don’t have the skills to step up to the next challenge… Let me tell you a little bit about me and it may just help you.
I sometimes wonder how I went from being completely unemployable to becoming a business owner? How was it that in 2006 I was unemployable and had no qualifications and by 2015 I was educated to the equivalent of a degree and managed a team of 40 within the local authority? How did I go from spending 8 years of my life in Prison to then sitting in boardrooms strategically planning with PHD’s and doctorates within local authority and Public Health?
My business is about creating GREAT LEADERS and I have read many articles on what it takes to be a TRULY GREAT LEADER. With all this information WHY is it that we still have so many ineffective leaders and managers that destroy workforces?
Businesses lose 2.7 Billion a year due to dysfunctional teams, and who’s fault is that? The workforce? NO, its leadership teams and I’m going to explain WHY!
Let’s look at another form of dysfunction. Here’s one that we all know “dysfunctional families” now this is a subject I know all about both personally and professionally. We have many people that say they grew up in a dysfunction family, but where does the dysfunction comes from? A lot of the time this is generational, PASSED from parent to child, until the cycle is broken.
Windows – a book about unlocking potential
This is the first chapter of a book I’d like to write about my life, unlocking potential and what I’ve learnt form both sides of the tracks – I would really appreciate your views on it . . .
What a beautiful day! I am on a train travelling north to deliver my first appointment as a professional speaker. How did my life get to this point? I look out of the window – it’s a delightful Spring day in April. The sun is shining and the bright colours of spring are washing over me, the beauty leads to a deep breath and a feeling of being grateful for my life today.
Looking out of this window makes me think of the many other windows I have looked out of throughout my life, the people and places that are related to those windows, some are still in my life today – others are gone and some, are shadowy figures that I can’t quite remember.
My name is Gethin Jones and as I write this I am a 46 year old man that runs his own business. This is a new venture as up until last year I had as successful career within Portsmouth City council. Within the council, I managed a young person’s service that focused on young people who were at risk of entering the criminal justice system. I also managed the Alcohol Intervention Team that supported increasing drinking, heavy drinking and dependent drinking clients. My last role was as a service manager overseeing a staff team of 40 that looked at reducing health inequalities to the most deprived areas of the city. To put this into context I need to tell you about my life post 2006.